Your Marriage Can Thrive Even in Today’s Climate

After dropping my price on a small table, a man on Facebook Marketplace said he wanted to buy it. He lives in Missoula, but his sister was coming to Kalispell and could pick it up.

She was a lovely young woman, and we chatted as we tried to wiggle that table into her hatchback. Turns out she’s getting married in May. 

“Oh, blessings on your marriage!” I said. “My husband and I have been married for almost 35 years.”

A dark cloud passed over her expression. “Really?” she said. “I’ve been anxious,  knowing how many people’s marriages fail. And I’ve heard how hard marriage is.”

I told her that my husband and I are followers of Jesus, and she said she and her fiance are, too. I encouraged her that Jesus is the answer to marriage success and that Matt and I have a marriage that keeps getting stronger and sweeter the farther down the road we get. She looked greatly comforted by that word. 

This is similar to the message I hear when I listen to the Dave Ramsey podcast. He will have baby-step millionaires call in or have couples stand on the debt-free stage and describe how they got where they are financially. 

“What do you tell young people about staying out of debt and building wealth? Can it still be done?” Dave asks. And every time the answer is a resounding yes. And Dave ends every podcast by saying, “There’s only one way to financial peace, and that’s to walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus.”

Same message for marriages. It’s a resounding yes that marriages can thrive and last until death do us part, even in today’s climate. I know, because we’re doing it, and I know a long list of other couples who are doing it. 

What is the secret? Get on a budget and have a financial plan. Learn how to communicate clearly and lovingly. Persevere through hard times as a team. Rest on Sundays and go to church together. Eat dinner together and have fun together. Forgive each other. But above all else, walk daily with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus. 

Early in our marriage, Matt and I found a verse in the Bible that we call “our verse,” in the same way some couples say it’s “our song.” In Colossians 1:17, Paul says of Christ, “He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” Can marriages hold together? Yes. When husband and wife choose to walk closely with Christ and live in obedience to his word, yes the marriage can hold together.

Intention is the word they use on the Ramsey podcast constantly. The difference between people in debt and the people who are winning with money is intentionality. You want a good marriage, but it doesn’t just happen magically. You have to be extremely intentional about where you’re going and work hard to get there. Every day you pick up your Bible and he picks up his Bible, and you both consistently lean in hard to learn what Jesus wants and lean in hard to do what Jesus says. Then one day you’ll find yourself 35 years into a marriage full of joy and peace.