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In Between Today and Not Quite Perfect

Do you know what I’m afraid of the most? I said, as I slipped on socks before bed. (Keepin’ the romance alive.)

What? he said.

Knowing when school starts I’m going to mess up something with someone, I said.

Yes you are, he said. And you’ll be in a school full of other teachers who are going to mess up something, too.

But I just want…I’m so…I just hunger and thirst for righteousness.

That’s a good place to be.

Yes, but it means I’m always a little bit miserable, I said, as I turned off the bedside lamp.

A few hours before we had been laughing around the table with friends, as Matt told them about being 6’ tall and weighing 115 pounds in high school. How he could never get enough food to eat.

I would often wake up in the middle of the night hungry, he said. I could hear my stomach growling.

My son has the same body build and metabolism. I remember one day asking if he was hungry. He said, Mom, I’ve just gotten used to always being hungry.

Getting used to always being hungry.

That is me, with the constant growling of my heart to do what is right.

Do you feel hungry to be perfect?  -christyfitzwater.com

I bring food to school a lot, because those high school boys I teach are just so hungry. One day I brought some sweet bread to class, and I thought one of the boys was going to weep.

Is that for us? he said.

Yes, child.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. (Matthew 5:6 NIV)

Yes, child. Righteousness is for you. 

We will be filled.